These past few weeks things have been rough. God has chosen to show me that I do, indeed, have a 2 year old...
And I'm grateful for every second of it.
Wait, what??
I know that if you're friends with me on Facebook you probably don't know that I do, really, love my life. (And if you're not friends with me on FB you're missing out! Links will be at the bottom of this post!)
I have a friend with a baby that's a micro-preemie. She was born before 30 weeks. I'm sure that her mommy would gladly be cleaning up poop messes if it meant her daughter could come home.
A woman in my Due Date Club with Franklin had a still born baby. I'm sure she'd take dealing with tantrums if it meant her son could be with her.
My boys try my patience. They send me into prayer several times a day. They make me cry several times a week.
But I laugh with them. I get sweet cuddles. I get to see their faces light up when I'm gone and come back (even if it's just a couple of mins while I go pee!)
He got into my makeup and drew on his eyes with lipstick...
Today I'm grateful for my wonderful births! The first was a hospital birth. Granted, it wasn't perfect but it could have been worse. The second was a great homebirth.
Recently I went to a fun get-together where birth stories were shared. There were many happy stories and a few sad/disappointed ones. (They all ended with healthy babies so they're all success stories in my mind) I found myself silently thanking God that my births were good. I could have ended up with a huge tear or an unwanted c-section or my baby sent to NICU or kept from me for some reason. I didn't. My tear with Franklin needed stitches but wasn't horrible and healed fine and I barely tore with Jonathan. The only time Franklin was kept from me was when they did the "newborn assessment" (I was numb from the waist down and couldn't go) and when they circumcised him. Jonathan was never taken from me. I was able to breastfeed both immediately. We had no trouble bonding in either case. There was no birth trauma.
Jonathan Boswell Lea Morin: The newest addition! Thank God for a child that actually sleeps. I'd heard stories of babies that slept in 3-4 hour stretches at night, but I'd never had one until now. He's also very content to lay on the couch or in his swing from time to time. This is awesome because I can actually put him down to tend to my spirited son. I always find it amazing how much love you can feel for a person upon just meeting them; actually, before even meeting them. This is such a testament to God. I loved both of my sons before they were born and even more once they got here. God loved us even before that!
Franklin Gaudelio Lea Morin: My spirited toddler! Yes, he tries my patience (actually, that's an understatement most days) but he also never fails to make me smile and laugh. His giggle is infectious. He is adorable, and I swear he knows it! He's also very bright and picks up on things very quickly. (Which plays into his spirited nature...he gets bored quickly!) Again, the experience is another testament to God. Even though we try His patience He manages to love us. (And I'm sure we make him smile and laugh!)
Today I'm thankful for my husband. I probably should have written this LAST week because our anniversary was actually Dec 15th!
We've been together for 5 1/2 years and married for 4. We have one spirited, adorable, loving son with another on the way in just a few weeks (seriously, like 4 weeks).
I'm thankful that he's been an amazing father and husband. He went through Air Force Basic Training so that he could provide for our family. When I said I wanted to stay at home he supported me 100%. He's been sacrificing time to himself and time with his family to go back to school so that he can advance his career. (Trust me, 2 nights a week makes a HUGE difference)
Has marriage been easy? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA........no. Has it been totally and utterly worth it? YES!!!
We've had our ups and downs (who doesn't?) and come out of it stronger than ever. He stands beside me when I feel strongly about something and holds me when I'm weak.
Hug your husband today.
Andrew Peterson
Dancing In The Minefields lyrics
I was nineteen, you were twenty-one
The year we got engaged
Everyone said we were much too young
But we did it anyway
We bought our rings for forty each
From a pawn shop down the road
We made our vows and took the leap
Now fifteen years ago
We went dancing in the minefields
We went sailing in the storm
And it was harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for
"I do" are the two most famous last words
The beginning of the end
But to lose your life for another I've heard
Is a good place to begin
'Cause the only way to find your life
Is to lay your own life down
And I believe it's an easy price
For the life that we have found
And we're dancing in the minefields
We're sailing in the storm
This is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that's what the promise is for
So when I lose my way, find me
When I loose love's chains, bind me
At the end of all my faith, till the end of all my days
When I forget my name, remind me
'Cause we bear the light of the Son of Man
So there's nothing left to fear
So I'll walk with you in the shadowlands
Till the shadows disappear
'Cause he promised not to leave us
And his promises are true
So in the face of all this chaos, baby,
I can dance with you
There's a special day at Heavenly Homemakers called Gratituesday. Basically, you take Tuesday to remember for what you're thankful. I'm joining this week!
A little bit of backstory for those joining that don't "know" me. My husband and I are in the red right now financially. We got there because our insurance doesn't pay for a midwife and I desperately want a homebirth. (And I refuse to go on base for medical care unless I absolutely have to) So, we've been paying her out of pocket. Praise God that she gave us a good price! Add in that our insurance also doesn't pay for a chiropractor (I've heard that sometimes you can see one on base...but that might just be for Airmen and not dependents) and we're buying raw dairy and more nutrient dense foods (read: stuff you can't really find at Walmart) and it all adds up.
We pay our bills and then live off of the credit card the rest of the month. This is not a practice I recommend! However, it's what we have to do at the moment. I meal plan, shop sales, and we've cut back on eating out and "fun" eating and whatnot. (It works out because it's healthier...) Every little bit we can save counts a ton.
Which brings me to my thankful post.
Today I'm grateful for the kindness of strangers.
Last night when we went to the grocery store Stefan was still in his uniform. (We left pretty quickly because we had two stops to make) While in line we noticed the manager pull our checker aside for a moment and then stand and watch her ring up our groceries. My first thought was that maybe she's new and being observed (I've been there and that's exactly what it looked like) When the groceries were rung up Stefan went to pay only to have the manager step in and say, "Someone is going to pay for your groceries in honor of your service. So, this is taken care of; you all have a good night." Honestly, it took a second for it to click. A perfect stranger paid for our groceries. That was $70 that we kind of don't have and ended up not having to spend. That was a good chunk of our food for the next two weeks that we got for free.
I have a post that will go up tomorrow about praising God even during the hard times. Check back tomorrow. I can't help but wonder if this was His way of blessing me/us for remembering to praise him...even when we don't want to...
1 John 3:17-18 (NCV) Suppose someone has enough to live and sees a brother or sister in need, but does not help. Then God's love is not living in that person. My children, we should love people not only with words and talk, but by our actions and true caring.
Sometimes I get nostagic because I didn't do something big with my life. I didn't become a model, I didn't finish the acting thing, I didn't get to go to medical school, I didn't travel the world (YET!), and I didn't get into the Air Force...
However...
I get to listen to baby giggles over the simplest things. I get to enjoy "hugs" and "kisses" (he doesn't "know" he's doing them but I take it anyway) I get to see his face light up when I come in after he wakes up from a nap.
That's when I realize that THIS is what I was meant to be doing; and THIS is where I'm supposed to be in life. Nothing is more fulfilling than watching my son grow up. Nothing warms my heart like thinking about him growing up and about us having more children. Being a doctor couldn't do that, being on stage (or back stage) didn't do that, and I'm sure that the Air Force wouldn't have either.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust the Lord with all your heart,
and don't depend on your own understanding.
Remember the Lord in all you do,
and he will give you success.
